JonnyDark's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Friend Zone]

Needs work but potential nonetheless

Ok for you, criticism is easy. Meet these pointers and the song will sound so much better.

1. Tune the guitar before recording. I shouldn't need to mention this but you should never ever forget this! I'll let you off this time, if I catch you doing it again I'll cut yer ear off.

2. Learn to play the song better, you should be able to play it with you're eyes closed. Sometimes you sound like you're stumbling over parts and it just detracts from the whole thing.

3. Practice singing more. Your voice sounds immature and unsteady and the only way to improve this is to sing and sing alot. Just keep practising, pushing your range and your voice until you have control over it like a well exercised muscle. And don't sing through your nose so much.

4. Sing louder, and clearer, prouder. Make me feel what you're trying to say. Your singing lacks conviction and with a song like this you want to make your audience feel it. Especially on parts like 'get the fuck out of the friend zone.'
Mean what you say!

5. Either revise the lyrics or revise the rhythm in the vocal part. In parts it sounds quite awkward so change one or the other.

6. Keep the same tempo all the way through. It feels as if the song was awkwardly stitched together from two separate parts. Some songs benefit from rapid tempo changes, this one I doubt would so keep your timing consistent and let it groove more.

Stick to those pointers and this song should improve massively. Good luck!

Sawdust responds:

Thanks man. I know it's not exactly John Mayer, but I guess I rushed recording it. I mean I got a nice progression and wrote the rest in 5 minutes, so then I guess I should have practiced more.

Also about my singing, well, I mean I'm only 14, I can't really sing in a regular range without singing crap, so yeah. I'm not a singer by trade either. Whatever.

Thanks for the advice!

[Je cherche la musique]

I can tell this was whipped up perty quick

Most of that was just electronic noise, and not the cool aesthetic good kind, there was a considerable amount of tonal dissonance but it wasn't even used to good effect. It just sounded messy

The drums themselves seemed out of place and basically in my ears everything was clashing, badly.

I don't mean to dissuade you at all, keep making music, keep experimenting and uploading it but next time I think you should spend more time on it.

maxman43 responds:

thanks for the feedback.

[<Electric City>]

Nice but could do with some variation

I like the way this is composed, has a nice vibe to it. The problem is that it's suffering a bit in the way that Jazz-Funk does in that although sounding and feeling good, it takes a while to get to the point and does a lot of repetition. And man that's cool, repetition is good and all but once you've established the groove it needs to go somewhere and that's the problem with this; it doesn't.

The opening is promising, comes in with a twiddly little synth pattern, an nice deep bass line and then the drums hit the groove. Nice. Problem is it doesn't develop much beyond that. No new ideas come to the table and it just stays the same for four minutes when I was really hoping for some variation.

All this said you may have just wanted this to be used in a flash or to be remixed somehow and in that sense it achieves it well as it isn't in anyway obtrusive. Also singing your praises, it's well produced and ultimately has a nice feel too it. Drums are nice and punchy like they should be.

Overall good job but I'd like to hear some more variation.

DrWaldo responds:

Yeah i was actually worried about the repetition, although i did remix already but it basically has the same pattern with new drums , and bass. Its alot slower also. But thanks for the crit :D