JonnyDark's Reviews

[Drunk Science]

Awesome :D

Enjoyed this thoroughly
Even the music by Sherbethead at the end :D

[Friend Zone]

Needs work but potential nonetheless

Ok for you, criticism is easy. Meet these pointers and the song will sound so much better.

1. Tune the guitar before recording. I shouldn't need to mention this but you should never ever forget this! I'll let you off this time, if I catch you doing it again I'll cut yer ear off.

2. Learn to play the song better, you should be able to play it with you're eyes closed. Sometimes you sound like you're stumbling over parts and it just detracts from the whole thing.

3. Practice singing more. Your voice sounds immature and unsteady and the only way to improve this is to sing and sing alot. Just keep practising, pushing your range and your voice until you have control over it like a well exercised muscle. And don't sing through your nose so much.

4. Sing louder, and clearer, prouder. Make me feel what you're trying to say. Your singing lacks conviction and with a song like this you want to make your audience feel it. Especially on parts like 'get the fuck out of the friend zone.'
Mean what you say!

5. Either revise the lyrics or revise the rhythm in the vocal part. In parts it sounds quite awkward so change one or the other.

6. Keep the same tempo all the way through. It feels as if the song was awkwardly stitched together from two separate parts. Some songs benefit from rapid tempo changes, this one I doubt would so keep your timing consistent and let it groove more.

Stick to those pointers and this song should improve massively. Good luck!

Sawdust responds:

Thanks man. I know it's not exactly John Mayer, but I guess I rushed recording it. I mean I got a nice progression and wrote the rest in 5 minutes, so then I guess I should have practiced more.

Also about my singing, well, I mean I'm only 14, I can't really sing in a regular range without singing crap, so yeah. I'm not a singer by trade either. Whatever.

Thanks for the advice!

[Link - ASH]

You need to learn how to mix better

Before I get into it any further, the most glaring flaw in this song is that it's horribly mixed and mastered.

I was fine with the keyboards at the beginning even if the auto-pan was a bit too much but when the drums came in, it was awful. The whole thing is just far too compressed to the point where there was no definition in anything, just noise. First step to improving this track would be to ease off the compressor as the whole thing just sounds crushed. I downloaded to see if it was the newgrounds player compressor doing it but it's in the original mp3 and it's terrible.

As for composition, it's all right, but it doesn't really go anywhere. The drums plod along all the way through and the melodic parts are fairly uninspired.

I'm sorry to be harsh but if I just told you you were doing well you'd get nowhere and I doubt you'd appreciate that.

The currency of success is failure, you're going to fail a lot before you make something utterly brilliant. Consider this one of the fails on your path to brilliance.

bullygil responds:

Thanks for this.I really needed someone to tell me for real if it's good or not.I will stop uploading for now and I will work on my songs harder.
Again thank you for your review:).

[Je cherche la musique]

I can tell this was whipped up perty quick

Most of that was just electronic noise, and not the cool aesthetic good kind, there was a considerable amount of tonal dissonance but it wasn't even used to good effect. It just sounded messy

The drums themselves seemed out of place and basically in my ears everything was clashing, badly.

I don't mean to dissuade you at all, keep making music, keep experimenting and uploading it but next time I think you should spend more time on it.

maxman43 responds:

thanks for the feedback.